Without my permission…
Our nervous system does not want resolution…it wants repetition.
We want familiar…we crave familiar.
THAT is the reason we stay in uncomfortable situations because of ‘comfortability’…ironically.
**Our own patterns make us complicit in our own suffering(Carl Jung)**
We can only break a pattern by replacing it with another.
Easier said than done…for the same reason…it’s easier to stay in what seems familiar.
Changing a pattern takes a lot of effort.
Over the last decade plus EVERYTHING in my life changed…without my permission.
People, places, things and patterns…either dead, gone or replaced.
The things I struggled to cling on to…I did so with butter fingers…they too slipped away.
Was I being punished or was I being gifted a clean slate.
Took a while to determine that.
I have a handful of people who know me from my first life…a handful from my second life and the rest…brand new.
Forced to change my life…without my permission…people, places,
things, patterns.
They were a repetition of something l could not sustain.
Most of them were not even MY patterns…I was designing myself to fit into someone else’s patterns…
Those were easy to drop.
I have done this @5 times in my life…starting from square one but it was always with or for someone else…
This time is different…
This time…it’s for ME!
Some internal patterns are still a work in progress…ongoing.
Spoiler alert…
It was NOT a punishment!
